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25.1.09

Fill It Up

Proverbs 8:35-36: For whoever finds me finds life and obtains favour from the Lord; but he who fails to find me injures himself; all who hate me love death.
2 Corinthians 2:15-16: For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance of life to life.
Psalm 19:7: The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul.

My car was low on petrol, so I filled it up at Petronas near my house. After my car had it's "meal", filled up for the next 550-600 km, I headed to my next destination and came to a halt at a red light. I took a deep breath, taking in a whole lot of air and the smell of petrol, then came this revelation: cars always smell of petrol right after they are filled up and the smell fades off gradually...until the nest time they are filled up with petrol again.
...Just like how we smell like 'mamak' after we had banana leaf or roti banana at a mamak shop.
...Just like how we smell like God after we have our date or hangout with Him, getting filled up with more of Him :)

A friend once told me that he could smell the stench of someone's soul that's dead, and according to him, it really stinks. Talk about advance sense of smell! Personally, I don't want to smell death, I'm afraid I will puke :(

This world is polluted by the stench of death. If there was a perfume that can cover up the stench, I bet many would die to buy it. But it would have been temporary, and the bad news is there isn't any.

However, there is one good news - we are all offered free flow of life (that's the opposite of death is you haven't know this :P ) that can revive the parts in us that are dead and take away (not just cover up) the stench of death! Yipee!!

To start smelling sweet like life, we do what we do to our cars with petrol - fill it up. Find life itself and start filling up. Fill life and get life. Fill death, and you'll get death.

On days I dated Mr. J, I feel invincible (giggles). And when I connect with others, the aroma of Mr. J passes on to them. His joy, love, enthusiasm, hope and excitement about things in life are contagious! But on days I didn't date Mr. J, I am the old wicked witch, and I smell like her too! I will snap at the smallest things. I'll worry til a pimple pop, and blame everyone for the teh tarik being too sweet (Ok, I may have exaggerated, but you get the point...and Fudge can testify to this [Sorry Fudge for my crappiness!])

Being filled up with life is very liberating. But the smell fades of gradually as we allow things of this world to come in contact with us. Perfumes don't last forver too. When cars run dry, it's serious damage! It is so important to get filled up constantly so we don't run dry. Even better, stretch our capacity to be filled with Him more and more so that we can be filled with more and smell even more like Him! Wow.

I am definitely setting time apart to get filled with Mr. J today because He is after all the most romantic person in the whole wide universe. I want to smell like freedom, joy, love, faith, hope, peace and Him.

What about you?

24.1.09

Out Of The Ordinary

Today is the one day in my entire life (so far) that is really intriguing. I've never had a day that has so many out of the ordinary incidents or things. I guess it means I need to come home more often :P hahaha.

Out of the ordinary incidents in chronological order on 24th January 2009 in Sin Yee's not-so-ordinary life:
1. A car crash on the NSE highway involving eleven cars in a row.
2. How beautiful Kuala Kangsar is (something I have forgotten, tsk tsk tsk)
3. How slow people in Kuala Kangsar drive (something I must get use to in this week)
4. Myriad of hampers of all shapes and heights standing all over the living room (my parents are really well-known here, I suppose?)
5. Aromac - the shower head that gives smell to your shower, haha. It's really cool.
6. Fighting with my lil cousin to play his PSP on our drive home
7. Taking a really loooooooooooong ride home. I think my butt is injured from sitting in the car for too long
8. Traffic jam in Kuala Kangsar town
9. Five new framed photos of my brother in mortar board and robe, and my long call on the living room hall, including the one in my granma's house
10. Granma's dyed light brown hair (whoa! I totally love my granma :) )

I certainly miss my hometown very very much. I definitely need to be back more often although my heart belongs elsewhere...

Happy Chinese New Year!

12.1.09

Those Were The Days...

We agreed that it was too long since we last met. Since Doctor Goh E-Bay is back from Aberdeen for 2 weeks, we finalised one gathering finally. The place was La Bodega, Bangsar. Doctor Goh, Tunku, En En, Miss Banker, 'Roslina' and Ah Sin were there. Au Yong and Kit Kat couldn't make it, so was Gaurus (we suspected that replacement class was the reason).

We had a great time! Our table was undoubtedly the noisiest one tonight. Our laughters were probably heard downstairs. It was like this 10 years ago, and it still is like this now. How nice :) We even predicted who's the next to get married (LOL). Catching up with old friends and sisters who were such an important part of my life, and laughing our heads off to the comedy in our lives, is something I will always cherish and keep in my heart.

Of course, like every other gathering we had after we all retired from check-weight-everyday-sport, we recalled the stupidest, craziest and the best moments we had together as teammates more than a decade ago, not forgetting the people who changed our lives whom we now dearly miss...including that skinny Uncle Lee, our bus driver for more than 6 months in 1995.

As always, blur Doctor Goh turned to me and said 'You were my only classmate last time during primary school here tonight.'

'I wasn't your classmate.' Ah Sin gave a puzzled look to Doctor Goh and was returned with a confused look on Doctor Goh's face.

'You were in CBN, I was in Kuen Cheng.'

'Eh! Sorry!' Doctor Goh said while turning to En En, 'You were the one!'

And we all laughed at Doctor Goh's blurness, as always :D

And then it hit me. Not all of us here could recall all the moments we had then (which I wouldn't trade for anything). If they were not recorded, one day, some of those precious memories will be gone. GASP! So, I decided to put some of those craziest moments that I can think of now here:

  • Throwing our slippers 4 floors up and breaking Mun Yee's room window with one slipper thrown by the 'professional' during prep.
  • Writing this in our autograph books: "What do I hate - boys" (HAHAHAHA)
  • Being the only ones who could slip through the tiniest gap in the school gate to buy food from the kantin.
  • Karaoke-ing our lungs out to Paeda-Rap, Michael Jackson's, Always, Zombie, 25 Minutes and other Indian songs from Priya's cassette on the bus on our way back to Endah Condo.
  • Doing needle scales and splits on a moving bus.
  • Making Twister mat with coloured school exercise books just so that we can play Twister in our dorm when we were supposed to be in class (I'm not so proud of this somehow, HAHAHA. Kids.... GO TO SCHOOL!)
  • Almost going to sleep at the closed LRT station because the school hostel gate was locked after 11pm and we couldn't sneak back in after yum-cha-ing at 3 a.m.
  • Putting up Beauty & The Beast, Phantom of the Opera and Pocahontas musical shows in our condo's.
  • Everyone climbing over the girls hostel main gate at 10 something p.m. only to have the last person open the gate and said 'Hey, it's not locked!' (Darn it! HAHAHA)
  • Yogurt eating competition in Uzbek.
  • Begging Manan to lock the doors at our training hall and disappear for 10 minutes just so that we start training late (KEKEKEKE)
  • Removing the batteries of the weighing machine in the training hall.
  • Playing Chi-Ku-Pang with Cikgu Chew on the bus all the way from KL to Taiping.
And so many more...

Those were the days :) Thank God for all that! Or else I will be an antisocial-bitter-bookworm teaching in a school back in my hometown now and not having LIVED 14 years of my life. Oh God, thank You!

8.1.09

Funeral Crashers

If there is a horror story that scares me, this is it.

In our chit chat after gobbling down some yummy cheese chicken at Salmon Steak, we somehow end up on the topic of funerals in a country far far away (don't ask me how, but we started on politics :-S ).

The horror of the story is not about a dead man leaping out from his coffin and chewing people up or the coffin suddenly floated in the air. The horror that scared me was the people who attend funerals in this country far far away.

Both my friends from this country far far away said to me that people in their country treat funerals like 'kenduri's'. They see a funeral, off they go for some free food, even if they don't know who's the deceased who is of course, unrelated to these people (lets just name them Funeral Crashers).

On the table when they are eating, they just eat and be merry like they were in a pub. They don't even care about who lies in the coffin! What's worse is that they expect the host of the funeral to serve Grade A food. If not, they will make a huge fuss out of it. I don't even have to say what will happen if you don't serve them food. You can imagine it yourself.

So the sister of one of this friend of mine from this country far far away once spoke against these Funeral Crashers in their grandfather's funeral. She got into trouble for it. (GASP!)

Just listening to the story makes me furious :(

"Why don't anyone do something about that? Why don't you guys just don't serve food at funerals?" I asked in my upset tone. "We are used to it already." Friend from this country far far away said.

HELLO? Just because things are they way the are doesn't mean that's the way they should be! Talk about sikap tidak apa... sigh...

But then again, it is a very important principle that we should honour our guests in functions or funerals, whether we know them personally or not. However, I still find the Funeral Crashers' attitude a stink. C'mon you guys... have a heart!

Let me warn you... don't crash at my funeral, or I will haunt you for life.

... gee, scary heh?

3.1.09

Heart Break = Car Accident

~Reflection of the past~

Heart breaks
. They are inevitable (Luke 17:1). They make status quo messy and make mess messier. They are hard to face. Don't fool yourself by saying "I'm fine." Get real babe! It is never easy.

You must be thinking how it doesn't make sense - why did God make healing so hard if He is really so good and our Jehovah Rapha?

Well, lets just say heart breaks are like car accidents. Nobody wanted them to happen. They are unexpected. But they happen anyway, whether it was a romantic relationship, a family issue or just a friendship.

When car accidents happen, the damage to the car, no matter how minimal, can never be repaired in one quick fix. It takes more than one step to get the wrecked car repaired. Even a small dent! One cannot knock the dent back to its normal shape AND spray paint the dent spot at the same time. The spray paint would be uneven. The knocking comes first, and then the spraying. If the damage is done to the engine, oh boy, you can imagine how many complicated steps it would take to get it repaired. The bottom line is this - reparation and restoration of a heart broken into a thousand pieces don't happen overnight. Healing can never be complete overnight. It takes stages of acknowledgment of brokenness and surrender to God for Him to fix our hearts together in one piece again.

But why not do it all at one fix if He is really the Almighty God?

I remember how I thought I was healed from my breakup with Teng Yung only to find myself hurting even more when I discovered that he was going out with someone else. What's worse? He's happy with her. Knowing that is like pouring kerosine onto the fervent fire that was already burning me to death slowly. Wasn't I supposed to be healed? Did God ignore the broken heart I surrendered to Him?

Yes, He did. I was the one who stopped taking His prescription until full recovery. I stopped surrendering all the parts of my broken heart left unattended to into His healing hands. i held on to some. I did not let go. I held on... so opposite to 1 Peter 5:7.

God knows better (Thank God someone does!). Sometimes we're just not ready for everything in one big dose. Even medicine for fever must be taken in stages of separate doses. It works the same way for heart breaks. God waits until we regain our strength from the bad fall, and then He will tackle the issues which we are now ready to deal with. He knows how to care for our wrecked hearts because He made us. We can never truly comprehend how He works to heal us (Isaiah 55:8, Proverbs 3:5-6). But the truth is He does heal us.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3).
Just take it step by step. It's not easy, but it is possible ;) - For nothing is impossible with God (Luke 1:37).

Don't rush healing :)

God bless!