FooLish O-Me.

Quarrel. Quarrel. Quarrel.

A friend once told me that it is an essential element to have quarrels in a relationship, and it is normal. I naively believed what he said. But now I know the truth. Next time I will ask anyone who told me this: "Normal to who?"

One of the ways Satan draws people away from God is through quarrels. In 2 Timothy 2:
23Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels.
24And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.
25Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth,
26and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will.

I looked back into the times in my life in which I had arguments with people I love, and yeah, the bible verses opened my eyes to see the underlying result and consequences of quarrels.
I never quarreled with my bf for 5 years, well, at least not much. I don't know why. But my friends always told me that quarreling is an usual thing in a relationship, and they commented that something was wrong with mine because I never really quarreled with my bf. Haha.

But then, at the moment I accpeted Christ, out of a sudden, quarreling became a 'norm' in our relationship. He said to me that it is a 'for-sure-will-happen' thing, because his friends also go through the same situation, quarreling over the conflicts in faith.

Both parties are hurt in quarrels. And sometimes, it even ended with break up. Is it worth quarreling for? Now I would say: NO.

I admit, for the sake of ego I had hurt my loved ones deeply through arguing and quarreling with them. And here, I want to confess and apologise to all these people, and especially you (if you are reading this), TY. I shouldn't have quarrelled. I realised that quarreling does not solve anything, instead it only creates resentment among ourselves and draw us furher apart from each other and from God.

I am sorry, and I love you.

PS: Read your email, TY. And I cried :') I've never read an email like this from you.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot. He answered another prayer of mine!! Heehee. Just now all the library PCs were occupied and I thought I won't be able to online today. Then I went to M10, chat with AiChing, an prayed on my way back to the library that there will be a PC for me. Guess what? There was one when I entered the library! Haha.

He never disappoints.

Everyone gets disappointed by someone, or disappoints someone, each day. I was disappointed by my bf before, and last week I disappointed my friend for ditching him for lunch last minute because it was going to rain (I'm awful! Darn...).

But He never disappoints.

I came across this passage as I was reading a 2002 volume Our daily Bread yesterday:
Psalm 130
5 I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope.
6 My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.

Just as the verses said, the watchmen waited and waited for the morning to come, because they know for certain that they will be able to see the sunlight the first thing in the morning, and they waited in that hope.

After I accepted Christ, I faced multiple persecutions, especially emotional ones, from people I love dearly. It was worst when my bf started accusing me for many things I did wrong and that I did not take him or our relationship seriously. At one point during my quiet time with God, He told me to uncling myself from my bf as he is hindering my Christian race (Hebrews 12). I ignored His message a few times, but when there was a confirmation from one sister and one brother, I could not pretend that God did not speak to me.

My bf is a baggage that I find most difficult to let go of more than anything else I have in this world and life. And why is God asking me to give up on someone so precious to me that I will sacrifice my life for? I couldn't see the purpose at all at the beginning. But now I know why. And I am glad this trial took place.

This experience revealed to me that He never disappoints. He taught me to have hope in Him and His word, His promises. When I was facing hard times, I always remember His promises to me. In Genesis 22, Abraham was called by God to sacrifice his one and only son, Isaac, something which no normal human can do, or has the will to do. But Abraham did. God was touched by his faithfulness, and PROVIDED for him, in the end, Isaac's place was replaced with a goat provided by the Lord.

I always remember now that whenever I face hard times, on the verge of breaking down, He will provide. This was what He told me. And thanks to Lawrence, I will always remember that I am one who walks on God's promises ;)

When I did break up with my bf, it was difficult and heartbreaking beyond description. I cried so much :P But immediately after that, God extended His hand to me, and yes, He provided, just as He promised. I was touched by so many brothers' and sisters' love at this point, like Kenny Kee, Charmaine, Allyson, Lawrence, Aiching, Joy and Hock Chai. I could not deny the power of His love. Initially, I was tearing because of the break up, but minutes later, I was tearing because of joy and love.

Upon surrendering my bf into His hands, God had began working in his life and soften his heart in ways that I did not expect. My bf may not be able to see it, but I do. And now that we are both back together, I thank God for pulling me through such a trial. Yes, He never disppoints.

Those who wait on the Lord will never be disappointed. I can testify to that ;)

Honesty Does Pay

Joanie Yoder once wrote:
...as I was putting bags of groceries in my car, I discovered at the bottom of the cart a greeting card I hadn't paid for.

My question to you:
What would you do? Walk off as though nothing has happen because it is just a greeting card? Or return to the counter to pay for it?

Yoder continues:
...I immediately went back into the store, waited in line, apologised to the cashier, and paid for the card. A man behind me, looking dumbfounded, challenged me, "It's only a card! Who would have known? Weren't you a bit silly to come back?"
For a split second I did feel silly. But then I thought of something to say. "Should you ever lose your wallet," I replied smiling. "I think you'll hope that somebody silly like me finds it!"

I read Proverbs 11 yesterday. It reminded me that the Lord delights in honesty and blesses those who do what is right. Yoder commented: "So even though we may give up what seems like some easy money, we gain God's approval. That's worth more than all the riches in the world."

After reading this, I was reminded of an incident which happened 2 years ago when I was working in MPH Gurney Tower. It was a weekend, and I was assigned to the cashier sounter that day. Around 4pm, a man approaced and paid for a book. He left in quite a rush. Then I sat on a stool a few feet away from the counter, resting and waiting for the next customer to come and pay.

As I was sitting there for more than 15 minutes, resting and staring at the small TV screen which showed the recordings on the CCTV in the shop, I noticed there was a bunch of papers, folded together, in the basket right underneath the cashier counter. I thought: Hey, I didn't put it there. As I looked closer at the papers, they looked like money, all RM50 notes, folded together, in the basket.

I immediately turned my head from the TV to the cashier counter and voila!, there was the money, a whole bunch of RM50 notes folded together in the basket. I quickly walked to the counter and took the money, and counted...50, 100, 150, 200... it was RM1200 in cold hard cash!!

I was delighted at first! Thinking to myself: Wow! Money had falled from the sky for me! Hehe...don't you dare laugh :P And then I got back to my senses and thought it must have belonged to a customer. I buzzed for my superviser. And then we rewound the CCTV recordings and watched it carefully. We found out that the money did fall from a customer's wallet when he was paying for the book at the counter. The problem was: How are we going to return tthe money to him? And then I remembered: He placed an order for a book and left his phone number with us!

We immediately contacted him, it was a house phone number though, and found out from his wife at home that he was attending a wedding dinner at Evergreen Hotel nearby. We informed the wife about the money and she agreed to infrom her husband when he gets home.

The next day, I was assigned to the cashier counter again. Around noon, the man came and he looked so happy. We returned the money to him and he said, "Thank you so much! If it happned elsewhere, I don't think I'll ever get the money back!" At that point, I slapped myself (virtually) for being so dumb for not keeping that RM1200. But I knew I did the right thing, and was happy that I did what I did for that man. So I just smiled to him and said, "Be more careful next time, and really no big deal for returning the money to you."

And guess what? That man gave me RM100 on the spot as a token of gratitude! Haha. I was happier than ever. The money? Well, I spent it on Starbucks coffee for my colleagues and paid for some books and magazines that I reserved for myself until I got the money to pay for it, which I eventually did :)

Honesty does pay!!

Natural Law Lesson

Although the study of law is generally boring to the bone, sometimes, it does open my eyes to see things from an interesting perspective. Jurisprudence is my worst subject in Finals Part 2 because all the legal theories expounded by seemingly intellectual jurists did not make sense to me at all. I thought there was something wrong with me, but when I found out that many jurists ended up in the mental hospital, I knew then that the mental one is not me ;)

Anyway, my revision in the legal theory of natural law showed me something true. I learned a valuable lesson from this school of thought comprising of a number of legal theories, seeking to explain the existence of legal authorities in the society, that are linked by certain common assumptions. One of these assumptions is that there exists a 'higher authority', or in Kelsen's word 'Grundnorm', that binds man-made laws universally, although the posited laws can vary in application and interpretation.

The lesson I learned from natural lawyers is that man, as stipulated in the Word of God, have continually turned away from the Creator that they have become so far apart from Him now, and this process is still going on today. That is why as the world becomes more 'modern', man's image is becoming less and less like the image of God.

'Modernity', the need to keep up with time and changes in the society, is merely an excuse or a lie created by the devil to motivate people not to remain close to God but to drift even further away from Him. Just like when your car's bearing is off, it will drift off the road. Similarly, when a person's relationship with Him is off, that person will drift of the path that he or she was supposed to be walking on.

If you study natural law, you would have found out that it has gone through three stages of development, from the Greco-Roman natural law theory(before Christ), to the Midieval Ages, and then to the secular or modern natural law theory.

You may ask what is natural about natural law? The legal theory is called natural law because it focuses on men's nature as the base for the creation of laws that governs a society. So for example, as men are physically vulnerable, laws are made to protect our physical body, hence we have law prohibiting murder and assault, etc. In the Medieval Ages, Aquinas, the leading figure in the natural law theory, added to the survival of men the need for men to be close to God as another telos(means goals) of law. Subsequently, as men drifted further away from God and started doubting His existence, the secular natural lawyers like Finnis and Fuller were prominent, but they focus only on the procedural morality of law, not the substance.

I will not be surprised if in the next 50 years another natural law theory that is based on the premises of New Agism is proposed. Clearly, man is drifting further and further away from God ever since Jesus died on the cross for our sins. It reinforces the aim of the god of this world i.e. Satan, to keep us, God's creation, away from Him and from knowing Him.

This is the natural law lesson I learned.

Legalised Exploitation.

Exploitation does exist! The worse thing is not the fact of its existence, but the fact that legal systems, dominated by those exploiting and tacitly approving exploitation, legalised such exploitation.

One clear example is pornography - exploitation of women. Just take a look at any pornographic magazines and it makes me wanna puke. Once I saw a pornographic show on a friend's PC and I wanted to cry. Women are being exploited to satisfy the sexual desires of men, and the claim that it is 'art' is bullshit! No man, yes, I can assure you, no man buys Playboy or Penthouse, or watches a pornographic show for artistic purposes or enchancement of their artistic skills, but to fulfill their sexual desires!

You know what is the saddest part? The women can't see it.

The exploiters argued that this is a form of consensual exploitation, that the women are being exploited wilfully and willingly. 'Nobody is forcing them to do that!', they claimed.

But the exploiters are smart. Yes, they are. They used various tricks and economic incentives to draw women to enter into the world of porn, and programmed their minds to think that it is not exploitation and that it is all right to show your boobs or even worse, have sexual intercourse with an anonymus man in front of the camera and the TV. These exploiters made sure that thier act of exploitation is legalised, so that the exploitation continues.

Initially, women were pressured to have 90% of their skin exposed in the streets, some even became the prey of anorexia, and they did all sorts of treatment and surgeries, to make themselves acceptable to men. Legalised exploitation means that these acts were insufficiently challenged. And the acts have, with the passage of time, became a norm in the society. The exploiters are laughing their heads off.

Exploitation can be of many forms. Another example is in the cosmetics world. Just take a look at one shampoo ad on TV. A girl opens the door, and a guy carrying a bouquet of red roses was standing there, intending to ask her out. But the moment he saw her hair, which was frizzy and not so straight, he was disappointed and shocked, and the red roses died on the spot! The next day, ding dong, the girl opens the door again, but this time, the guy beamed and grinned, and they went out on a date. All because the girl used some XYZ shampoo and has straight, long, black, silky hair now.

Ridiculous? It does seem so to me. Women, if you claim that the cosmetics make you feel prettier and more confident, I tell you, it is bullshit(again)! It is because the exploiters tell you it makes you prettier, that is why you think it maks you prettier. Trust me, confidence and beauty comes from within. Even if I have the best make-up artist does my make-up and the best hair stylist does my hair, even if all the people around me says I look gorgeous after that, I am only gorgous after all that process!! I am not gorgeous because I am who I am, but because of the make-up, blah blah blah.... and even if all the people around me says I am gorgeous after all that transforming process, but if deep down in my heart I still feel low and inconfident, I would disagree with them all.

The other day I went window shopping with a friend of mine who was looking for a skin whitening cream. Well, I stood beside her and just listened to the sales girl do her talking and explanation. When she mentioned, 'See? The cream doesn't make you feel sticky too!' And then I remembered... once upon a time, I bought a lotion, and the sales girl said th exact same sentence. Somehow, at that moment, the lotion does really seemed not sticky. But after I reached home and used it for the first time, yikes!!... it is sticky!

Women, you are the one to end the exploitation. Take your stand. Respect yourself as you are. Don't listen to the exploiters!!

I thought I lost You.

It helps to be aware of your personality type, but don’t envy someone else’s to the point that you apologize for who you are. God created all types, so it’s all right to be you!

For the past week, a friend of mine had been really irritatingly hyper about life and wonders God has done in college.

For a split second, I asked myself why is she so extremely happy about? And then I realised something was wrong with me. If my walk with Him had been a close one, and a right one, I would have felt the same way as my friend... irritatingly hyper. In fact I would just be hyper, minus the irritating part.

So there I was, finding out that the passion in my heart for God had somehow died down a bit. When I looked back to what I did for the past few weeks, I realised then that I have grieven the Holy Spirit with many things I have done. I made it happen...I allowed myself to be distant from God.

For a while, I prayed fervently for Him to bring me back to Him, to feel that closeness again, that love and hope. I thought I lost Him.

But I was wrong.

Through this incident, I found out that we will never lose Him unless me deliberately reject Him and His existence in this place, in our hearts. He hears our cries. Well, He definitely heard mine :)

I thought I lost You...But You found me again.

I love You.

Forgotten

On Easter, few days ago, I wanted to blog about my first truly meaningful Easter celebration. But as I got online and typed a sentence, TY asked for my help in completing a report about human computer interaction that must be handed up to the lecturer the next day. So, I deleted the whole sentence, helped TY with his report, and went to bed. The blog posting was forgotten.

Few days later, here I am back in Penang, I wanted to retype the posting that is incomplete. But guess what? It had already been forgotten. And now... I can't remember what I wanted to blog about for the past few days. So forgotten.

Lesson learned: The next time I have an idea about what to blog about, do it right away or jot it down somewhere first, before it is forgotten.

Crap! I am againg at an alarming rate!

Oh, I Abhor You...

Hehe, to those who know the song 'I adore you', this is the total opposite :)

This morning, I managed to drag myself off bed at 7.15am, which is a great achievement for me :P, and joined my friend for a morning walk along Gurney Drive.

We were happily chatting and walking briskly. Every moment was pleasurable...until we were walking behind one uncle in his mid-50s, wearing a faded T-shirt whith maroon and beige stripes, light grey slacks, black shoes, holding a half cigarrette in his right hand.

What I will share from this moment onwards is not suitable to those with a weak stomach, and probably weak heart, so I advise you to stop reading now and go fly kite. But if you insist, you are reading at your own risk.

So, me and my friend were observing this uncle as he took a puff on the cigarrette, immediately after that, he fired a bullet so disgusting that I shrieked at the spot!

I thought the horror would end, but unfortunately, he proceed to gather force and momentum...and 'Ptooh!' There goes another bullet... "Ptooh!' and another..... "Ptooooooh!" and another. He did it multiple times!! Right in front of me and my friend who got so sick at what he was doing.

We picked up our pace to overtake that nightmare. Somehow, when we passed him, I couldn't help it but said out loud, "Disgusting!! Euughh!! Horrible!!" and my friend echoed, "Yeah!! So geli....". I added, "This was how SARS got spread to the public!!"

I guess we were loud enough, cos the uncle stared at us :)

Public Spitting.... I abhor you!!

Cheated by Plasters!

Few days ago, I went to Gurney Plaze for dinner with a friend. As we walked pass a stall selling mobile phones accessories, we stopped and I had a look on the dangling things you hang on the handphone, searching for one to replace my GSC black leather Elektra straps that broke last week.

As I was browsing through the straps hanging there, which made my eyes blur cos there are so many variety of colours and designs, I saw this particular one with a red cross on it, and I immediately thought it was a cross per se. It was attached to a round face, with a plastered head, and tongue sticking out. So I thought 'Cute!', but the main reason for my purchase was the CROSS. It was RM 4.90.

Fine, I bought it, cheerfully. But when I reached home, as I take a closer look at my new possession, I saw what was wrong with it. The red cross was no CROSS, but it was actually the plasters on the face's head, also red. Oh!!

Beh Tahan!

Each of us will meet people who we can't stand. No matter how much we try to like that person or to put the past behind, everytime we meet this person and talk to him or her, we just can't stand that person.

I met mine, about 4 years ago, when I stepped into my college for the first time. She can't seem to stop complaining about everything she sees! The first time I talked to her I got a shock in my life!! I thought, "Well, maybe she's having a bad day, or maybe it's me who took her attitude too seriously." So, I decided not to give the first impression that she gave to me about her a second thought and buried it deep down in my mind.

As the years go by, as I was involved in student society activities, inevitably, I had to deal with her numerous times. I thought I will be able to feel OK with her, but you know what? She's gotten worse! And she still complains about everything she sees. She even wiped the keyboard before she uses the PC in the student centre.

One thing I realised she likes to do very much is that she always compare what she thinks is bad to what she thinks is good. Hello?? In order to help students, they have to be encouraged and corrected, not criticised with words like 'Yeah, why so lousy?', 'Ha! How come so bad one?', 'Why is it so badly done? Didn't you see the notice done by the secretarial course society?' And, YES, I didn't see the notice. She has to say with a face like I-don't-believe-it, 'Huh? What do you mean you don't know about it?' Like...duh! I mean what I said. I didn't see the notice and therefore I don't know about the talk that is going to be held. Simple. I didn't say anything wrong. What is wrong if I didn't see the notice?

It makes me wonder if anyone actually told her of her problem.

beh ta han!

I'm home!

It seems like I have gone to somewhere far far away for awhile. If I didn't return, this blog would have been abandoned and probably adversely possessed by some squatter who squatted on my property without my permission :) hey, my land law is still OK! hehe, Benson must see this...nah, just kidding.

By the way, life has taken yet another turning point, and guess what? I'm loving it! God has shown me that I am one who live and walk on His promises. Truly, He is faithful. And so compassionate.

Anyway, I cam across this email sent to me by a college friend about the difference between a friend and a best friend. Take a look ;)

Friend : calls your parents by mr. and mrs.
Best Friend: calls your parents dad and mom.

Friend : has never seen you cry
Best Friend: has always had the best shoulder to cry on

Friend : never asks for anything to eat or drink
Best Friend: opens the fridge and makes herself at home

Friend : asks you to write down your number
Best Friend: they ask you for their number (cuz they can't remember it

Friend : borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back
Best Friend: has a closet full of your stuff

Friend : only knows a few things about you
Best Friend: could write a biography on your life story

Friend : will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
Best Friend: will always go with you

SteReoType

Just take a look at any fashion, trend or leisure magazine today and you will find tons of similar-looking models, dabbed with 3 inches thick (or even more) cosmetics made of low-cost chemicals or supposedly 'organic' substances, posing with seemingly-not-enough-clothe dresses, trying to look cool and 'pretty' or sexy on the coverpage or an advertisement of a branded fragrance.

Yes, they look alike!

They dictate how a person should dress or look like in order to be labled goodlooking or beautiful in their own sense, the sense of this world, of this ugly world. Eughh! I can't imagine anybody would want to look like a fixed virtual doll according to the standards of this world. Well, if my maths is right, it should be something like this: Ugly world = Ugly standards = Ugly looks ;)

People, just be yourself. Just because you are not wearing something in trend or nice according to this world, it doesn't mean you are not beuatiful. BEAUTY IS SKIN-DEEP.

Want to see a clear cut case of stereotype? Look at the photo uploaded above. Voila.

Most Painful Thing

It's 12.30am and my bf is still out 'drinking with friends'. Ah, screw him.

I have better things to write about.

Some experiences are painful. So painful that it sticks on you your whole life. But there are times, and this does not happen to everyone, when it is another person's painful experience that is stuck on you. This occurs when that somebody shared the pain with you. Try to recall the latest sharing about a painful experience by your friend to you. Feeling the pain? Yup. But it is not that painful actually because our hearts are not imparted with the true extent of the pain that our friends felt.

But there is somebody I know that is able to do that. That special someone shared his one and only painful experience in eternity to the selected few in this world. And guess what? The extent of pain is equal to that felt originally by him - God.

In my 22 years of life in this ugly-yet-beautiful-in-many-ways world, I have met 2 persons who have had the opportunity to feel that pain our loving Father felt for us.

After a period of departure from his first church, Jared returned, and as he was praying, he suddenly felt this inexplicable stab of pain in his heart. God said to him in a painful voice, "I have so much to give to my youth, but where are they?" He wept out loud, the loudest ever in his life, that very moment, even before there was any music, before the Sunday service started. Since then, Jared had been contributing to youth ministry in his church and the rest is history.

Few days ago, Sue Ann, while praying, had a vision. In that vision, there was only her and Jesus, standing side by side, in front of a huge lake. A lake full with blood. As she turned to Jesus in the vision, He said to her, "This is the blood that I have shed for my people... but not all have come to me. So many of them are still not with me." Sue Ann was never the same again since the vision, because she felt the pain equal to that felt by Jesus, standing in front of the blood He shed for us.

I used to think that giving birth is the most painful thing on earth. I was mistaken.

Only one encounter with the pain God felt could stay that painful in these people's hearts. Imagine... how painful would it be if it were the sum of all sins and lost souls.

Inexplicable.

Should Have's

No, this is not a shopping list that contains the trendiest cosmetics or fashion tips that you should have. I'm not that type of person who will blog about it. Just get CLEO or FEMALE or whatever magazine with a skimpily dressed model at the cover, air-brushed, with lots of make up.

I returned from dinner yesterday and found my Chinese housemate, Y, sitting on the floor with her class schedule in her hand, sulking. She looked so down and sad, and all she did was stare at the schedule in her hand.

I sat down beside her and said all sorts of things to cheer her up. I even played the 'Sausages' game with her. She laughed a little, and returned to her original state.

She had been sitting there sulking for more than 2 hours. Over what? How displeased she was with her daily schedule and worrying about her studies.

This triggered a thought in my mind. Instead of sulking for more than two hours, at least a few minutes should have been used to consider how she can improve her studies and rearrange her schedule, etc, just to get herself out of that miserable state.

A lot of us are like that too. We may complain or blame ourselves or sulk over so many things in our lives, and ask questions like 'Why am I so stupid?' or 'Why I must go through so much pain?'.

Things happen for a reason. Yes, they do. Look at it as a life-learning process for you to grow up and be more mature....or more wise. Instead of feeling miserable over it, we should have done so many other things that could solve the problems. Just take a long look back at your life and see how many "should have's" are there.

God bless you.

TreeLess

Maybe it is the craze of bald-om after Thaipusam. In IPG, I not only see many of my Indian pals going bald, the CAR PARK is now bald too!

There used to be a huge tree, pretty old one, on the IPG CAR PARK. Two days ago it was still there when I came to college for the L** exam. But this morning it was gone! *GASP*

I thought the UFO must have abducted the poor tree, or maybe it had gone to the Middle Earth to attend the AGM of the tree-people like those we see in LOTR.

Hehe, OK...lets be sane again. The tree was uprooted from the CAR PARK. And the CAR PARK is now bald with tar toppings.

I miss the tree. Now, I will have no more leaves to remove from AiChing's SLK windscreen. And poor SLK of AiChing and Joy, they will suffer from sun burns and will never be fair again (Scientists, please invent a car UV protection lotion for cars!!). IPG is going to be even hotter now without Mr. Treebeard providing cool and shade to the CAR PARK. And, there is less oxygen to the increasing number of students here.

All these for 2 bloody extra parking spaces. Wow.

LAN no more.

Yahoo!! Yipee!! Sshhh... Ok, I gotta be rejoicing silently because right now the LAN Malaysian Studies Final Exam is still going on and I am out here, in the library, typing this! hehe. Oh, how I love breaking rules.

Well, actually, I am not breaking rules lar. It's just that I have finished answering the questions and passed up the paper already. So why stay in the exam hall summore? ;)

Did the paper in an hour's time, but I took 15 minutes extra for Moral Studies paper. I am so glad that there will no longer be LAN classes on Saturdays, no more LAN project to do and no more LAN quizes (although I skipped 60% of the classes on Saturdays, hehe) Now, my life is LAN no more!! YEAH!!

However, a mystery remains to be solved until now. From the time I paid RM 160 to the IPG front counter until this moment when I am typing this, I am still wondering: "Why the hell am I sitting for the LAN papers?"

Amazing Joy

Hehe, Joy, yes you are amazing! But sorry to let you know that I am not writing about you. Perhaps I will, in the foreseeable future *gasp*Oh, no! Look what studying law has done to me!*

In my 22 years of life, I have gone through much joyful moments and painful times too. In fact, to me life seems to have more painful moments than happy ones although I have learned gradually how to see things from the brighter side. But ultimately, I don't see a definite JOY.

However, life seems to have taken its turning point. For the past 5 months, I have been through more struggle and persecution, psychologically and emotionally, from all sorts of people, including those I love dearly, than the sum of challenges I faces in my life before these 'new life' began. Despite all these persecutions, I was never sad for a second.
Luke 2:10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. (KJV)

Yes, I was hurt on the way, and trampled on the ground, and thrown into a pit of sorrowful fire. Amazingly, I was joyful, truly JOYFUL, all the way.
Gal 5:2222 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, (KJV)

Thank God. If it was not for HIM, I would most probably suffer a long, slow death, or end up in Tanjung Rambutan, or hell by now. I would like to take this opportunity to ask for a favour from my brothers and sisters who read this to keep me in your prayer. As Jared said: 'At the rate you are growing, the devil will take opportunity to make you fall really hard.' TQ.

Clearly, that which does not kill me will make me stronger. Amen.

Satan's Work

As quietly as God works, Satan too have been working silently. This is why it is very damaging, since people are just too blind to see these invisible forces and if they do see them, it is very likely for them to make a mistake in telling the difference.

For example, when God has blessed a person with much gifts, it could be seen as 'Oh, I'm being lucky!', etc. They failed to see that they should thank God for it and they failed to see how much God loves them.

Many things around us show how the Satan successfully blinded many of us to see the beauty of the Lord. Visit this site and see how Bible verses were taken as 'hate literature'! www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=31080

Matthew 9:24
He said unto them, Give place: for the maid is not dead, but sleepeth. And they laughed him to scorn.

Yes, it is sad. But there is still hope. Perhaps, all these can be taken as a process for us to learn to be more compassionate, and to be a better example of Christ.

Matt 5:10-12
10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Rev 2:9-10
9 I know thy works, and tribulation, and poverty, (but thou art rich) and I know the blasphemy of them which say they are Jews, and are not, but are the synagogue of Satan.

Have you allowed Satan to blind you?

It's 50!

Yeah, welcome to my 50th posting in my Chocoholic blog! Didn't know I could even reach this point. Applause to myself *clap clap clap* OK, enough with the crap, let's get down to business.

February is ending and so much amazing things have happened in this year.

This morning when I was having breakfast at the college canteen with Aiching and Joy, I received a SMS from my hometown friend who is currently working in Singapore. The translated version goes like this "I'm getting married on 29th this month! Can't believe I will be the first despite all the statements I've made about remaining single. I will tell you the story later..sorry!"

As blur as I could be, I fell for it. I replied with a message of shock, put down my phone, started eating my pineapple fried rice, then I realised... there is no 29th this month. I got dooped!!

Embarassment aside... Joshua House celebrated Charmaine's belated birthday yesterday after our weekly prayer meeting. It is the tradition that before we get a bite on the cake, each person present will say a word of encouragement to the birthday boy or girl. So everyone said something, and Jonn, Charmaine's boyfriend, was the last to say it.

He started out with Charmaine being a Joshua House member, as a friend, as a daughter, and then as a girlfriend. He shared such touching comments, and with the way they were looking into each other's eyes, it was exactly like any romantic movie I've seen in the cinema... but this is even better because it's live!

Charmaine has everything necessary to be a good girlfriend. According to Jonn, what he looked for the most was love for God. True enough, one who truly loves God will never forget about love for family, friends, etc. Charmaine is an excellent example.

Jonn then said, "I really appreciate to have you in my life and thank God for it,and...", at this moment, all of us said, "And??And??Continue!"

The room filled laughter which made Jonn and Charmaine blushed. When silence took hold of the room again, Jonn continued, "You mean the world to me...and I love you."

Jonn then hugged Charmaine...and what was I doing? You guess it...CRYING :)

Does it matter?

The secret of a good life is to have the right loyalties and hold them in the right scale of values.
by Norman Thomas

So many people in this world engaged in unnecessary debates and caused themselves much trouble for concerning themselves with things that do not matter at all. Just try listening to others' conversations (not eavesdropping, but welcomed ones of course) when you are hanging out with a group of friends, colleagues, or even within your family. How many topics in the conversation are actually important?

No doubt, we need to get away from our hectic and busy routine life once in a while to stay sane by being insane and be involved in nutty actions or pointless talks just to laugh or have a good time. But most of us have forgotten the fact that there are many matters worth our attention much much much more than all these.

For example, questions like 'How does my skirt look?' or 'Is my butt beautiful?' or 'XYZ got higher marks than you for ABC paper ah?'
Pointless!

Just look at how many people out there who are suffering, and who could have lived a better life only if you divert your attention to them instead of all these pointless matters. A small effort from you can make a big difference! Who cares if your skirt looks odd or is your butt is sexy or if you got higher marks than another student in the class. When you die, all these will fade away and holds no significance.

So please stop comparing one's marks with another's. What matters is how you can do better than your current state, not theirs! Live your life! If you adopt another's standards, you will be living someone else's life.

Get a grip!!

PS: To Parvin, no offence when I got upset yesterday when you compared contract paper marks. I seriously do not care and was disappointed that you have engaged in pointless comparison. Sorry.

Pink Monday

Valentines is tomorrow.

Love is in the air
and PINK is everywhere!

I arrived at college to find men and women wearing PINK. I wonder how come PINK had always been used to associate things with love. Here are some of the meanings of the colour I found:

Love
Grace
Gentility
You're so Lovely (Royal Pain a.k.a. Gwen wore PINK)
Perfect Happiness (I need statistics to acknowledge this)
Please believe me (A friend's cousin wears PINK all over, she lies like an expert)
Romance
Friendship (I doubt this)
Femininity (Meterosexuals dilemma??)
Truth (Comment has been made above. How come the judges don't wear PINK?)
Passivity
Emotional healing (I don't see how any counselors prescribed their patients to wear PINK)
Calming
Affection
Caring
Sweet
Ethereal

In different places, the colour also reflects different element:
European : Feminine colour, baby girls
East India : Feminine colour
Japan : Popular with both sexes (Oh, this is disastour!)
Korea : trust (This is not foolproof)
Feng Shui : Yin, love

Honestly, I personally dislike PINK because since young, I find so many girls wearing PINK and they all somehow seemed to sweet for me to handle and I became 'jelak' of it and whenever I saw it, I want to puke! No offence to all those who likes PINK.

Now, guys are wearing PINK too! Arghh!!!

ReTreaT disCoverY

Back from Penang Hill Leaders' Retreat! Sorry, no photos could be uploaded yet
I miss the weather up there though. So cooling even though it's sunny. Exactly the same as Canada, my favourite climate!

Learned so much in the retreat and I had a smashing good time with my lovely brothers and sisters from Joshua House. Although it was a short retreat, I got so much from God and from them too! Life has become even more beautiful and worth it now!

The sharing on the Bible was about Moses, the book of Exodus and the tabernacle in Numbers. God truly opened my eyes to see the mindset that He wants us to adopt while reading His words. This is a discovery that I will treasure until the day I enter His kingdom.

Anyways, the retreat was truly a refreshing experience for me as it was my first official outing with Joshua House. The spiders, ands and mosquitoes there are twice and triple the size of the insects we find at home! And there are all sorts of other funny funny insects too!

In the mornings, I awake to find beautiful-sparkling morning dews on the grass. I haven't see this for a long, long time. Lots of beatiful houses, very old-victorian style, and flowers there too! Although the journey from the train station to the Methodist centre was quite tiring (Yes, it is time to work out), I enjoyed it very much!

At nights, when we sleep, the sound of the wind blowing and the movement of the leaves could be heard so clearly, and the insects' concert too.

It was a wonderful retreat. And I miss it :(
But I am glad that I know my life in this world now has taken a turning point. Now the roller-coaster ride has begun...and I am so excited about it!!

The World

It is ugly

It is scary

It is full of hatred

It is the world.

Look closely

You'll see

So much sorrows

So much pain

So much evil

It is the world

Everyday

Tragedy rules

In the headlines

In people's lives

In people's heart

In this world.

And yet

they have turned away

from the ultimate joy

the ultimate One

Full of love

that could save

This world.

It is so clear

It is so certain

We need more

of this love

to beautify lives

In this world.

Still

People made their hearts

Into stones

and then complain

about the tragedies

When they

Could have make

a BIG difference.

This

is the world.

So come

brothers and sisters

Let us strive

to be prayer warriors

So this infinite love

Can give endless hope

that counters evil.

It may be exhausting

And costly

BUT

this is the world.

Hepi CNY to y'all!

The poem, which sadly is not even a lousy poem (I'm not born a poet!Pls forgive me for that), was inspired by a discovery of an ugly truth :)

I just found out this morning that my house was suppose to be my neighbour's house...ermm, you see, my house is a corner/side house with empty land by the side. So next to my house is another house with a strip of empty land, it is the beginning of another stretch of houses.

When my parents paid deposit for this house which they purchased13 years ago (or longer than that), they actually paid for these two side houses. Right now, I am living in one side house, but my grandma is living in the house next to mine now, the second house in this stretch of houses, not the other side house which my parents had paid the deposit for.

It was only now that I found out that my neighbour did some 'dirty work' which was probably a bribe, to get that side house which my parents had paid deposit for.

Wow, this world is really ugly. And my neighbours are really difficult to love. They are wonderful examples of 'this world', so ugly, so sorrowful, so terrible. This is only one example of the evil things they did...and there's a long, long list of sich things they did. I will never look at them the same way as I did.

And yet, I have to love them, hoping that one day they will repent for their wrongdoings and sins. It id difficult...but the Lord's love keep me going.

Brothers and sisters, do keep each other in our prayers...because there are so many people like this in this world.

Victim of Prejudice

My landlady hates me.
Everything I do in her eyes is wrong. She'll confront me alone even if other housemates did the same thing as me. She depises me just because I have a large circle of wonderful friends. She accuses me for being evil, and asked me why I cannot be like other housemates who were according to her good because they do not bring friends to the house. Yes, those were her words.

But other housemates have brought their friends to the house, not once but many times. And she knew it. Why only bombard me?
Clearly, she has prejudices against me.
...for wicked and deceitful men have opened their mouths against me... Psalm 109:2

She calls me a socially promiscuous girl. She sees me as chastised... for the friends I have.

She hates Malays and Indians for no reason, well, at least she couldn't give me one reason when I asked her why. And just because a friend, Indian/Malay, comes to my place for tuition and help in her studies once or twice a week, she hates me. The problem clearly lies with her, not me. So much for 'perpaduan'.

She accused me for being 'bu san bu si' (having chaotic lifestlye) because, according to her, I bring all sorts of friends to the house. Until today, only AiChing, Joy, my tuition friend, Mandy and a junior came to the house before. The tuition friend had only needed academic help, so was my junior who only came once yesterday. Mandy only sat in my room for 10 minutes while she waited for me to pack to go back to hometown because she was giving me a ride to the jetty. And my landlady said "That day you some more brought an aunty home". Joy, came only twice, for prayer, less than 15 minutes, and to collect the stuff for the CF BBQ. AiChing, she only came to change so we could go for our evening walks along Gurney.

Only 5 persons...and she said that I am 'bu san bu si'.
...With words of hatred they surround me; they attack me without cause. In return for my friendship they accuse me... Psalm 109: 3-4.

Besides for my friends, she also despised me in other things, things that other housemate did as well. But she only confronted me. She should have lay down the restrictions and regulations when I moved in, not now. Or perhaps she should list down her love's and hate's (the list would probably only have endless hate's). She calls me evil....for being kind to my friends. Oh, I want to hate her so much!! But I won't.

I pray to the Lord to remove her prejudices, and also to remove the anger in me towards her prejudice against me. I know there's no need to hate her, because the Lord will deal with her.
...when they attack they will be put to shame, but your servant will rejoice. Psalm 109: 28.

Yes, through all these struggles I have been blessed. With more wonderful friends added to my already large circle of wonderful friends, who let me see my worth, and let me know they love me. Thank you God. Thank you Xiao Yue, Joy ;) and TY.

MeowinG-PineApple

A guy in college

whose name I do not know of

starting meowing to me

since yesterday

in the library

for no reason!

Since then

he kept meowing at me

whenever he sees me

in college.

And he has pineapple pattern hair.

Weird 'The Look's

So many things we do will cause others to give us a look, a weird look.
They look at us as though they have never seen a human, or an alien from another planet, or simple some crazy-nutty-weirdo to them.

Just like this morning (in fact almost every morning now), Jonathan and Hazwani, and many new students in college who I don't know, gave me the look when me and Joy were praying in the car. I can't help wondering what is their thought when they gave us that look.... haha, it's probably 'Look at those holy girls again.' or 'Yer...what are they doing?'

Here's a list of some of the things I did that resulted in someone giving me the look:

- when I started laughing by myself when I am alone after a funny thought crossed my mind
- when I stared at somebody for too long
- saying HI to a stranger
- acting nuts in public
- jumping around
- looking at two person talking to each other in the library
- smiling for no reason
- asking a friend an abrupt unrelated question
- crying in public
- talking to a stranger whom I thought was a friend

If you have faced different or funny situations like this, do post a comment and share the story ;)

Golden Globe Thanksgiving

It is now time for me to say thank you to many people...although I did not win any Golden Globe or whatsoever :) These people have opened my eyes and touched my heart to see and feel something that majes this life so much more beautiful. And I truly feel ashamed that I haven't been loving them :(

Nevertheless, here it goes:

My aunt - when I was back in my hometown for a week, my aunt bought breakfast for me every morning even without me asking. And she didn't ask for a cent back.

My grandmother - everytime I see her, I want to cry. I am sure you would too. She's in critical serious stage of osteoperosis, and yet she gathers her strength to cook my favourite dishes and nutritious soups for me when I am back in my hometown. Oh God, I pray really hard that He will save her.

My lovely family - my parents and brothers, and cousins made me realised that I am one of the luckiest person in this world. Without them, what would I be??

My wonderful close friends - thank you for reminding me that God is always near, and that the rainbow is always the most beautiful thing, and sunsets will not be what they are without you all, the CDs you lent me, the 1 cents you gave me and everything else. I love y'all...

My not-so-close friends - thank you for smiling at me or smiling back at me when I smile at you.

TY - all those times you have to bear with my imperfections. Thank you for your patience, although I know you have very little of it :)

Eveyone else - thank you for giving me the opprtunity to share my love, joy, and chocolate with you.

All those perasan and seemingly incorrigible people out there - without you all, I will have one thing less to work on towards knowing God. Thank you being a challenge.

Good luck to you all.

The Value of 1 Cent

I started collecting 1 cents since a very young age. At that time, I didn't really appreciate why I did so. I began after hearing a story about how a guy in some country far far away became a millionaire from collecting 1 cents. It seems quite an inspiration to me back then...but eventually, as I got older, I collect 1 cents out of habit instead of out of desperation to be a millionaire ;)

For more than 8 years in my 22 years of life, I just collected 1 cents which I got from the change I received at the cashier counter, from my friends...or from places where I found them lying on the floor...unwanted.

But after so many years, I began to see no point of collecting 1 cents. After so many years of collection, I calculated the other day, that I only managed to save RM20.00 (more or less) of 1 cents. I began to lose the zeal to collect 1 cents....until....

A friend who visited Myanmar a few months ago told me many interesting stories about the country and the people there. The things that intrigues me the most is their poverty. They work 30days a month only to earn from 38 cents to RM 3.80 (not the rich ones). It was a clear situation of 'the rich is getting richer but the poor is getting poorer'. However, despite their poverty, these people are so happy and lived a purposeful life!

It made me realise how much a piece of bronze metal weighing less than 5g can mean so much...and so many of us are casting them away, leaving them lying on the street when it could be used to help these people live a better life. All we need is 38 1 cents.... and I already got plenty of them :)

Value your 1 cents...if you don't want them, give them to me. I will go Myanmar this year...well, even if I didn't, my 1 cents would :)

Me and Lizard

When you are disgusted about something, like people digging gold (nostrils) in public especially in luxurious cars, or when you fear something more... they seem to appeal to you more, and happens often in your daily life. Am I right?

For example, the more you are afraid of spiders, the more encounters you will have with them.

This was the relationship, or perhaps you can call it fate, with lizards.

The first time a lizard ever lay its four tiny-sticky legs on my skin was when I was 10. I was attending training for gymnastics at a hall in Taiping. And there are so many lizards there. Once I wanted to throw some trash into the dustbin and the moment I lifted the lid of the bin up, a lizard, HUGE lizard, climbed onto my hand which was holding the lid. I screamed for my life and threw the lid on the floor, swung my hand until it almost came off. Thank God, the lizard fell and scatterred off to its next hiding place.

The second encounter I had with a lizard, at the very same hall, was in the toilet. The moment I stepped into the cubicle, a lizard, HUGE one again, climbed onto my right leg and again, I sreamed for my life and hopped and jumped around like a chimpanzee until it fell off from my leg.

The third time a lizard climbed onto me was around 1 or 2 years ago. I can't recall the details so I will not dwell in it. Nevertheless, in my room right now, a lizard, yes, it is a HUGE one, seems to be living there together with me and my roommate. Perhaps it has been there even before we moved in. So this roommate of mine always run across my room to go to the other room next to mine. This, amazingly, happens every day. It's like a routine. Funny....

I even stepped on lizard eggs before..and believe it or not, I crushed a lizards head before, with my bare heel. Yuck! I only heard a cracking sound. And when I turned and looked onto the floor, there is was, flatten...at the head.

Just yesterday, I had another encounter with lizards again. I wanted to take water to fill my pail with water. The moment I grabbed the senduk, a lizard, not so huge this time, climbed onto my right hand. Arrghhh!!!...hehe, nuh, this time I didn't scream. I just swung my hand like the first time until the lizard fell, carried on my business.

Sometimes, I wonder if the lizards have a conspiracy against me....or maybe they have plotted a spying mission on me. Of course....I'm not nuts enough to confirm that this was what they are doing to me :)

Nevertheless, I shall overcome my disgust and fear for lizards. So I will not encounter them again....well, at least not so often.

Death Omen? Nuh...

To someone superstitious, the sight of a dead cat in front of the house gate will make that person's day.

Although I am not suprstitious, I will still share this story.

Two days ago, as I was stepping out of my house to go to college in my usual beautiful morning walk, I saw a dead cat in front of my house... right in front of my house. A few crows were flying over it, chewing and nibbling at the cat... well, dead cat. The head and body were flatten until I can't tll which was which. Only its 4 legs were left 'undisturbed'. Surprisingly, there wasn't a lot of blood, but there were a lot of flesh!

On th same day, in th evening when I was walking along Gurney Drive with AiChing in our quest for a fitter body (which I failed to achieve despite so many months of 'effort'), we came across a dead dolphin. It was right opposite of Gurney Plaza, lying there motionless on the beach. 3 boys climbed down and got a really close look at it. The moment one of them suggsted touching it, all of them got disgusted at the thought of it and left. The tongue was sticking out, and its intestines were all over the place around the body. There was a long stick, wood I think, that pierced its stomach right above the hole where all the intestines came out from. Now there was a lot of blood. And it stinks like hell!

The creepy thing was, 5 minutes before me and AiChing reached the place where the dead dolphine was at, we saw a tree full of crows. And they are known as relatives of death. 5 minutes later we saw the dead dolphin.

Yesterday morning, when Parvin and I wer walking to the corner shop near my place to get breakfast before we attend a study workshop, we saw a dead rat. It is quite common in my area, as there are abundance of rats there. But it was quite disgusting. Not much blood, but lots of flesh again.

Death could be creepy... and when you saw what happens to these dead animals, you could imagine how tragic it was. But in th end, death is not so scary afterall.. cos I know, I will be at a better place. Much better :)

Hope I didn't spoil your apetite.

Wish U weRe tHere.

I am sure each and every of us had had experiences where we wished someone was there to share them with us. These are the moments you realised that there are so many beautiful things or creations in this world that are worth cherishing. These are the moments you realised that life is beautiful because you have loved.

Here are some of those 'moments' that I can remember:

1. Watching the sunset (it was only the sun and th horizon of th sea, no clouds, no island, no hills to block the sun) in PD trip with Lian, Mike, Chok Wei, Cindy, Alyssa, Goik, Kim Tat

2. Admiring the uncountable number or stars on the clear, black, velvet sky at the IPG CF BBG at Marina Bay. This was the first time in my 21 years of life to see so many stars.

3. Witnessing the formation of an whole, complete arch of rainbow right in front of me outside of McD's Sunrise. This was th first time in my life to see a whole arch of rainbow, so huge, and clear, each and every colour...

4. Feeling the soft cool breeze through my fingers early in the morning an Gurney Drive beside one of the trees, standing on one of the rocks...with my eyes closed.

5. Watching fireworks when there was some celebration.

6. Tasting the smooth, sweet, delicious chocolate, chocolate or cheese cake...or sushi...or ice-cream. Savouring evrery bit of the moment.

7. Laughing earnestly, laughing my lungs out at a really stupid joke when hanging out with friends or when watching a movie.

8. Walking along the beach, walking along a street, walking anywhere...alone. Wishing you were there to enjoy the walk...or sweat ;P

9. Playing in the rain and going nuts in it.

10. Looking out the window at the things that pass by when I am sitting in someone else's car, on the way to somewhere for something.

Wish u were there....

Chocoholic's Must Watch's

Last year was an amazing year for the film industry for Miss Chocoholic with great movies like Constant Gardener, Harry Potter 4, Zorro 2, Chicken Little, etc.

2006 is another year full of excitement for Miss Chocoholic, who anticipates to watch these movies... I can't wait!!

Here's Chocoholic's-Can't-Wait-To-Watch-Movies:

movies from last year which I'd love to watch
Cheaper By Dozen 2
Family Stone
Brokeback Mountain
Casanova

From 2006(first half)
Oliver Twist
Fearless
Munich
Ice Age 2
North Country
Nanny McPhee
The Inside Man
She's the Man
Freedomland
X-Men 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Underworld 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A Good Woman
Manderlay
Ultraviolet
A Scanner Darkly
Transamerica

Anybody want to join me?

Heart Broken but Pocket Saved

Arrghhh!!!! Sob sob... I went back to the shop in Gurney Plaza yesterday and the dress is gone!! Arrghhh!!!!
Somebody lucky got the dress d...sob sob. The pain in my heart is like a heavy stone landed on it, scattered..no, more like smashed into pulp. It was the most beautiful dress I have ever seen in my life!

Ok, that's it. I am not getting any new year clothes this year!

I don't regret not getting the dress. Well, at least I saved RM 189.00 ;)

Shopping dilemma episode 2.

What a coincidence! When I thought of this post I didn't know I actually started my chocoholic blog with the same subject... SHOPPING.

In Episode 1, Miss Chocoholic faces dilemma in deciding what gift to buy for a friend's birthday and it made her plunged into desperation of finding a solution to this matter that had been troubling her for so long. She found the solution! Can she apply it to buying, well...not gifts this time, clothes... for herself?

Now, in Episode 2, Miss Chocoholic is again faced with a dilemma in deciding what clothes to buy for new year, and again, the history repeats itself...she's plunged into desperation of finding a right balance between her scarce financial resources and her love for several pieces of fashion breakthrough.

As she went window shopping with two of her pals in Gurney Plaza, concluding to herself that she will not get any new year clothes for 2006 because her pocket's sinking at the rate of 6,000 mph and she has many relatively new clothes which she can wear for new year, she came across creations so wonderful and beautiful that she found hard to resist.

So, she has changed her mind now and ditched her 'not-buying-any-clothes' idea and replaced it with 'maybe-I'll-just-get-a few'. (talk about failure of self-control!)

In her list now there are Baleno 3 quarter pants at RM89.90, PDI 3 quarter pants at RM79.00, this beautiful red floral multifunction dress at RM 189.00 (ahh..Miss Chocoholic faints *thud*), FOS 3 quarter pants at RM 53.90, FOS tee written "Two bfs are better than one" at the front / "Too cool for school" at RM 30.00 (rounded up figure) and a spagheti top at FOS at RM 19.90.

Oh, how desperate Miss Chocoholic is now!

After much pondering and head-cracking mental gymnastics exercises, Miss Chocoholic.... is left without a solution. Instead, as she always did, she has now concluded that since it is so difficult to come to a decision on what to buy with her meagre funds, simply don't buy any! Problem solved! Yeah!!

This could be a new economic formula ;)

Happy 2006!!

Oh yeah, by the way, purple is the "in" colour now. So dig up all your purple stuff and wear them...or use them!!

Thoughtful Lil' Friend.

It is nice to know that in this sad sad world, in this dull dull life, there is still people around me that is so thoughtful.

When I was reading the TIME magazine in th library, trying very hard to find at least one example of current events which I can use as an example in my Jurisprudence assignment (but found none), Alex Wong a.k.a. Chung Heng ( I think that is how his named is spelled, Alex sorry if I'm wrong!), approached me and asked how I was doing. He then wished me Merry Christmas and said sorry for not sending me a Christmas e-card, but only managed to give me a testimonial on friendster which I regrettably deleted. I could only say thank you to him for the testimonial. Oh, I felt sooooooooooooo darn BAD!!

He actually took the courage to approach me and apologized for something which does not require apology?!

It was so thoughtful of him. Many students find him weird and bullied him in college, he still tried his best to make friends and share his thoughts and happennings in life with me, and other people in IPG.

Although it was 2 days after Christmas, I considered this a Christmas gift that I truly appreciate :)

Eaten alive

IPG Cafeteria, which is so pathetic that it is actually nothing like a cafeteria, is the citadel for blood-suckers. Yeah, and I mean it literally blood-suckers!

As I was enjoying my breakfast this morning, cherishing every bite of the nasi goreng and savoruing every bit of the telur mata kerbau, I was attacked by a full-blown offensive launched by these blood-suckers. It was as though they were on Operation Desert Storm!

Only ten minutes...these blood-suckers made me dance, scratch and cry like a baby whose mother refused to give her the candy she wants. Unfortunately, nobody came to rescue me from this attack.

I was defeated. I was eaten alive by these blood-suckers.

Their victory is evident on my limbs. And my defeat will remind forever more that I hate.... mosquitoes!!

Blood-suckers!! 24 bites and the lumps are even in a pattern...hmmm, looks like a big J on my calve. Gtg...time to scratch!

Biscuiteer.

Usually, when a beggar holds out his or her hand to beg, the beggar will get pecuniary donations (actually, some people don't donate. They give them just a few pennies to rid off the irritating beggar) or fiery donations (this happens when they either get shoo-ed off or rude remarks from people who don't give them anything).

But something funny and rather unusual happened two days ago.

When I was sitting comfortably on the bus heading back to my hometown waiting for the bus to start the journey, a beggar came on the bus and held out a crumpled paper cup to each of the passenger on the bus, speaking softly with the pitiful tone in his voice, asking us to give him some money and have pity on him.

Seriously, why should we pity them if they do not have pity on themselves?
But this was not what I thought of lar of course!

When he held out the cup to me and looked at me, I just stared back. I know it's rude but... I can't help wondering what's really going on in his mind!

So, I was thinking, I have a 5 dollar note and a few 1 dollar notes in my pocket, but I was wearing a really tight jeans (yeah, I put on weight, arrghh!!) and it would be so difficult to get the 1 dollar note out of my pocket with all the bags on my lap.

I just kept staring into his eyes...

And then...

I stretched my hand into one of the bags on my lap and searched hard for a packet... while I was doing this the beggar thought I won't give him anything and turned to the passenger behind me to beg for money.

Just as he turned.. I held out my hand to him, saying :"Nah, hor lu (give you in hokkien)."

He turned back and looked stunned!

I was holding out a Tiger biscuit to him :P

I thought he needed food maore than money at that time. Haha. Well, what happened next? He hesitated at first, but I continued holding out the biscuit to him and he took it eventually. When he left the bus, I saw him holding that piece of Tiger biscuit :)

The passenger next to me laughed at me. Oh well...who cares? I became a biscuit volunteer...biscuiteer lim sin yee hahaha.

Fiery enough.

Yesterday night, I watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire for the second time.

And I still like it :)

To me it was better than the last 3 Harry Potters. The action part was good (especially the dragon part), romance..hmm, very little but I don't mind, comedy...yes, way funnier than the old Harry Potters.

So I am giving 5 thumbs up to this Harry Potter movie. I am sooooo looking forward to the next episode (but I doubt that there is going to be one).

Oh...10 thumbs up to hot bods of Harry n Ron too!! *drool*

Malaysia's Trademark Scary Ppl

The bus ticket sellers at the Butterworth jetty are suppose to sell tickets... not scare people!

They are so annoying. They will ask every single person they see at the station "Pergi mana? KL? Ipoh? KL?"... "Ah Moi, mau pergi mane?"... "Lai, KL, Ipoh?Alor Setar?"... Once a guy even asked me " Ki to lok (where to in hokkien), An Soon ah?" Hello?? Do I have a line written on my forehead saying that I'm from An Soon??

Worse still, some of them think that people around them are deft! They don't ask us where do we want to go... they scream at us! If you shook your head after they bombarded you with one or two questions on your destination, they will bombard you with extra free questions.. and they are still regarding your destination. Get a grip!! I shook my head and said No already! Now leave me alone!

So I observed how all these ticket sellers approach each an every single person whether they are standing, sitting on the bench or brisk walking to catch their bus. They are so annoying that people just ignore them. I bet if they just sat at their ticket counters and attend to customers who came to the counter, they would have gotten more business... and scared less people.

Maybe having to stay at the filthy bus station does things to you... it makes you go nuts perhaps.

But these scary bus ticket sellers have no right to turn us ordinary people into nuts like them too.

Motion of Love.

Motion of Love sounds like a song title, or novel title to many...even to you I suppose? :)

Five motions of love I gave to others:
1. Smile - a smile can save a life, and it makes you feel your presence is appreciated.
2. Hug - it keeps one warm and very very secured :)
3. Offer chocolates - sorry it has to be chocolates, blame me for being a chocoholic.
4. A phone call - talking on the phone with my loved ones keeps me close to them.
5. Pray - yes, I do pray for them. I'm not Jesus who can perform miracles like building a chocolate factory in a second, so this is the best I can give.

When you love somebody, what do you do to show that you love him or her? Think about it. And I hope you will realise that there have been people showing their love for you too but you might have been too ignorant or blinded to see that. Be more sensitive to your surroundings and observant, you will be asking yourself :"How could I be so blind all this while?"..ok, you don't need to bash your head for this, cos I still love your head :P

The love that I am talking about is not the BGR love or sexual love that many have turned to today... but a type of love more certain and special... that you can show to your friends, family, bf/gf, spouse, your classmate, roommate, or even a stranger on the streets. This love from above kept me going, cos life is all about love. I've seen it... have you?

p/s: Please forgive me for being all lovey-dovey today... it must be all the chocolates I consumed non-stop for the past two weeks.

Be NiceR to Earth!

SAVE PLANET EARTH!!!






IT'S THE ONLY PLANET WITH CHOCOLATES!!!